I ended up having a female patrol meet me there and try and search her as delicately as possible. Woman calls the police. She hadn't been searched or anything. My cousin is a cop and told me he received a call from an elderly lady who lived on the beach. After we sat down to eat, the three Class Councilors looked at me, laughed, and shook their heads. She then said if you have heard this excuse I will gladly sign your speeding ticket. My dad went back to his car to write the ticket and the speeder lit up a … He hears his partner mutter something, but doesnt quite understand, so once again demands what is it. By Gabriella Paiella. More information... People also love these ideas One evening as I was crawling out the window from an adjoining room (we broke into the lab by removing ceiling panels and crossing over) I heard footsteps. And the candle was to burn the body and the evidence. r/PoliceStories: An offical subreddit dedicated to the game Police Stories. Guard shows up a couple seconds later, sees me closest and asks "did you see someone run in here just now?". A candle. Off he went, and I couldn't believe my fucking luck. --- LIKE AND I WILL UPLOAD MORE REDDIT STORIES! He says "what the hell are you a damn slot machine?" I'm catching up to the person in the back of the group when, out of the blue, he stops and sits on a stone bench in the neighbors garden. We weren't even sure how she got there. Despite their best efforts, the bird was not easily removed. Your placement of the quotation marks had me imagining you chasing after the kids while being followed by a comically large jazz troupe. Not me, but I have a family member in the Highway Patrol. He eventually realizes he can't escape and finally pulls over. America, you so scary. We had to ban her from the store, but I felt bad. ._9ZuQyDXhFth1qKJF4KNm8{padding:12px 12px 40px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM,._1JmnMJclrTwTPpAip5U_Hm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:40px;padding-top:4px}._306gA2lxjCHX44ssikUp3O{margin-bottom:32px}._1Omf6afKRpv3RKNCWjIyJ4{font-size:18px;font-weight:500;line-height:22px;border-bottom:2px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:8px}._2Ss7VGMX-UPKt9NhFRtgTz{margin-bottom:24px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP{border-bottom:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:2px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP:last-of-type{border-bottom-width:0}._2qAEe8HGjtHsuKsHqNCa9u{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);padding-bottom:8px;padding-top:8px}.c5RWd-O3CYE-XSLdTyjtI{padding:8px 0}._3whORKuQps-WQpSceAyHuF{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px}._1Qk-ka6_CJz1fU3OUfeznu{margin-bottom:8px}._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-weight:500}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb,._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-size:12px;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb{font-weight:400}.horIoLCod23xkzt7MmTpC{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:#ea0027}._33Iw1wpNZ-uhC05tWsB9xi{margin-top:24px}._2M7LQbQxH40ingJ9h9RslL{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px} Yup, her ass went to jail while the cop tried not to laugh. Reddit contributor Cold_toast_n_butter tells the story of a friend who called 911 when he was a kid because his aunt was having a baby. Unsplash, Matt Popovich 1. A hammer tucked in her waistline. To each question the man only giggled, but giggled even harder and began to fidget when they mentioned what was in the back of his pants. Back door comes flying wide open and about a half dozen kids come running out of the house. So my dad goes and gets the jailor, but doesnt tell him what to expect, thinking itd be more entertaining. Chinese cops are just like their counterparts everywhere … Cop comes to the window, starts asking her questions. /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/ReredditLink.f7b66a91705891e84a09.css.map*/My dads partner is furious and when they arrive at the station he just says "get the jailor", not wanting to even remove the guy from the car he was that done with the situation. Facebook Reddit. 7. The next day (ironically, World Turtle Day) I went riding, and came across a fair sized painted turtle crossing the bike path. One of the DoD police officers used his night stick to push the turtle off the road. Article by TheFunnyBeaver.Com. 148. I guess this is really more sad than anything. Summer Smith-August 30, 2013. At this point my dad draws his gun and keeps it lowered and sees two more squad cars rapidly approaching. 6. I picked it up, and as my hands transported it closer to my face so I could take a closer look at its retracted head, my brain went "Wait, you idiot!! Edit: Not Michelangelo. He told me this funny story: One day he pulled this woman over for speeding. After interviewing several retired police officers we found out that they have some crazy stories to share. Woman calls police. In order to end the standoff, they had to call in an off duty officer who was an avid turkey hunter to distract it with turkey calls while another officer chased it out of the garage with a garbage can & a lampshade. My dad cannot see what they are seeing, so he asks what it is. The napkins was to clean up the bloody mess. Ill show myself out ;_; I think this story was better than 80% of the ones at the top. His partner just gets out the words "Cuff him and throw him the back, his face completely red. The city that hired me has a mandatory leash law for dogs. By. Law enforcement abuse stories regarding: abuse of power, corruption, and other misfortunes in developing police states. Luckily we were able to contact a relative to come get her. People on this can behave very violently and can be very difficult to subdue, often injuring officers in the attempt. 20. The thread started with an excellent question, ‘Police of reddit, what is the funniest thing someone you are arresting has said? ._12xlue8dQ1odPw1J81FIGQ{display:inline-block;vertical-align:middle} The only the jailor says, much to my fathers and his partners surprise is "Godamnit not another one", grabs the shoe, pulls it out of the guys ass, and pulls him out of the car and leads him into the station. A black shadow shot across my car “I was sitting monitoring a stop sign late at night, somewhere around 2-3 in the morning. The police knock and he opens the door with the biggest shit-eating grin I've ever seen in my life. Looks to me and says "oh good evening, I think they went that way. 15 Funny Short Stories Hilarious. From funny jokes about the donut-based stereotypes to ingeniously creative and funny social media ‘warnings,’ scroll down below to see the ultimate examples of police jokes. A vegetable peeler to... Peel some prunes or something, I don't know. I asked her some questions and for ID, and she didn't seem to understand anything. At that moment the woman pulled a vial of horse semen from between her breasts and explained how she was a horse breeder and needed to get the sample to its location for insemination before it went bad. A vegetable peeler in her pocket. You can almost hear the cop thinking "not worth it" as he stops at the edge of … The police don’t like it when you call them to insult your spouse Welp, it’s safe to say that some people are completely unaware of what warrants a call to the police. - r/AskReddit Subscribe for more Brainy Memes and Tumblr Posts. My dads partner immediately backs away, his face turning bright red, and the other officers immediately being laughing hysterically, as the guy continues to giggle. Coworkers, Funny, Law Firm, Rude & Risque, Serbia, Wordplay | Working | December 28, 2020 My husband is a senior partner in a big law office. .s5ap8yh1b4ZfwxvHizW3f{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);padding-top:5px}.s5ap8yh1b4ZfwxvHizW3f._19JhaP1slDQqu2XgT3vVS0{color:#ea0027} Advertise. I was speeding while on my way home, I wanted to get home then go over to my girlfriends. We didn't have animal control on our base, so the MP's and the DoD police were the ones who dealt with strays and such. I think she was one of those old lady murderers. She was complaining that her neighbor stole her sand (it's a beach, ITS WINDY) from her beach onto his and wanted the neighbor to come and put back every grain of sand that he "stole.". Press J to jump to the feed. 3. My dad exits the squad car and proceeds over to the right side of the car they pulled over. There was a video posted on r/Australia yesterday of some NT cops chasing a couple of sex offenders on foot. Cookies help us deliver our Services. Husband calls police. She clearly had dementia, or Alzheimer's, or something because her thievery did not make any kind of sense. He told me this funny story: ... Dispatch sent out a priority 1 assignment, person with a weapon, police officer and partner say they are near and will take the call. Want to watch more amazing Reddit stories? Shucked off my jacket in a flash, grabbed a discarded styrofoam cup and took off my glasses, then leaned against the wall next to a bunch of people. A Romanian man called police to report hearing a strange noise in the house he happened to be burgling. By. At him fidgetting, my dad and his partner get a bit nervous and my dads partner once again asks what is in the back of his pants. I walked to the security office and found a very confused looking old lady. Just as they got to the grass, this HUGE snapping turtle shoots his neck out at lightning speeds and grabs the night stick out of the DoD cop's hand and starts waddling off into the woods. ._1x9diBHPBP-hL1JiwUwJ5J{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:#ff585b;padding-left:3px;padding-right:24px}._2B0OHMLKb9TXNdd9g5Ere-,._1xKxnscCn2PjBiXhorZef4{height:16px;padding-right:4px;vertical-align:top}._1LLqoNXrOsaIkMtOuTBmO5{height:20px;padding-right:8px;vertical-align:bottom}.QB2Yrr8uihZVRhvwrKuMS{height:18px;padding-right:8px;vertical-align:top}._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._1LLqoNXrOsaIkMtOuTBmO5,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._2B0OHMLKb9TXNdd9g5Ere-,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._1xKxnscCn2PjBiXhorZef4,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 .QB2Yrr8uihZVRhvwrKuMS{fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)} @keyframes ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5{0%{transform:rotate(0deg)}to{transform:rotate(1turn)}}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq{--sizePx:0;font-size:4px;position:relative;text-indent:-9999em;border-radius:50%;border:4px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyTextAlpha20);border-left-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);transform:translateZ(0);animation:ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5 1.1s linear infinite}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq,._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{width:var(--sizePx);height:var(--sizePx)}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{border-radius:50%}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq._2qr28EeyPvBWAsPKl-KuWN{margin:0 auto} Do you want to lose your nose?" Wow, I'm amazed that you gave them a third chance. He pulled over a guy who was speeding, and the guy was being kind of smart with him. ... Not me, but I have a family member in the Highway Patrol. She had a small notepad in her bra strap. 15 Funny Short Stories Hilarious. ", Completely bewildered, I ask "are you high?!?". Sometimes it's even more ridiculous. Told them to get sober drivers and kick the kids out. She was walking drunk with some friends, all under 21, and a bike cop jumps out of the bushes and surprises them all. Liang Xiao’s Suicidal Suicide-Stopping Dive. — Hunter S. Thompson They pointed multiple guns at a guy for erratic driving and giggling? Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. She responds by spitting out coins while answering. It was a bright red stiletto high heeled shoe, with the heel imbedded firmly in the mans rectum. After coming to a stop he walked up to her window and gave her his classic "Do you know why I pulled you over." And if you check out this list filled with police humor compiled by Bored Panda, you will see that they most certainly do. My dads partner nods at him to be ready, preps for a moment, and then yanks the guy's pants down. A family member of mine- He was sitting by a red light and saw someone speed through it. The pinwheel was to randomly select her next target. Here in NV, property owners have the legal right to dispatch wildlife that are damaging, aggressive, or injuring anything. Summer Smith-August 30, 2013. .LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH{fill:var(--newRedditTheme-actionIcon);height:18px;width:18px}.LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH rect{stroke:var(--newRedditTheme-metaText)}._3J2-xIxxxP9ISzeLWCOUVc{height:18px}.FyLpt0kIWG1bTDWZ8HIL1{margin-top:4px}._2ntJEAiwKXBGvxrJiqxx_2,._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{height:24px;vertical-align:middle;width:24px}._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-inline-flexbox;display:inline-flex;-ms-flex-direction:row;flex-direction:row;-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center} Fresh AskReddit Stories: Emergency personnel of reddit, what's the dumbest situation you've been dispatched to? Long story short, he had me a hide a meat ball in a roll so he would sneak it past the lunch lady. He rarely ever gets to write one, so this is one of his favorite stories. Pens and marker were for writing down on the notepad a plan for the murder. the giant burly Sergeant (who is now a Police Chief btw) had to sneak a meatball past the lunch lady. Pecadillo_ Cop here. A couple of weeks ago I saw a video showing some buy getting royally bitten by a sizeable snapping turtle. Several packets of pens and markers. Who doesn't love stories of crime gone wrong or police getting called into highly ridiculous situations? Kids obviously keep running so I announce that i'm in a foot chase and start after them. Some of these seem too ridiculous to be true. Like just run after them for sport? 2 seconds later I hear my squad leader key up the microphone. 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Friends forgot to send her greeting cards. It was a stormy winter night and my reason for speeding I told him was the hockey game is on and the radio is not working. remember that video from yesterday? and ran in his house. /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/IdCard.0f76af1b61e8e247d28f.css.map*/._2JU2WQDzn5pAlpxqChbxr7{height:16px;margin-right:8px;width:16px}._3E45je-29yDjfFqFcLCXyH{margin-top:16px}._13YtS_rCnVZG1ns2xaCalg{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._1m5fPZN4q3vKVg9SgU43u2{margin-top:12px}._17A-IdW3j1_fI_pN-8tMV-{display:inline-block;margin-bottom:8px;margin-right:5px}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY{border-radius:20px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;letter-spacing:0;line-height:16px;padding:3px 10px;text-transform:none}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY:focus{outline:unset} ._3-SW6hQX6gXK9G4FM74obr{display:inline-block;vertical-align:text-bottom;width:16px;height:16px;font-size:16px;line-height:16px} Photo: RunPhoto/Getty Images ... Police Handcuffed and Pepper-Sprayed a 9-Year-Old Girl Graphic body-cam footage shows her screaming for her dad as officers from the Rochester Police Department force her into a … Well fuck, security - I mean, who else would be around the buildings at this hour. I point at the block opposite, "Yeah, guy took off that way." 19 more crazy funny police reports. She quickly responded that she knew that she was speeding, but asked if she gave him an excuse for why she was speeding that he had never heard before, could he let off with just a warning. Some of these seem too ridiculous to be true Because the police blotter is endlessly entertaining, we present you with the second installment of crazy funny police reports. 4.Boyfriend is refusing to bring her casserole. Whether you find stories about drug busts gone wrong, prostitutes barking up the wrong tree, or taser disasters fascinating, you will enjoy these for sure. One of the is about to get nabbed but runs into croc-infested water. Get ready for a hurricane of LOL as you read all these funny short stories. Start sprinting, a couple seconds later I hear a shout "hey you! ... FOUR police cars arrive in thirty seconds; their precinct is a half-mile down the street. She was once told that the taste of silver and copper makes the smell of alcohol magically go away. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Fresh AskReddit Stories: Trolling law enforcement - what's your story? The security guys had video of her putting things in her pockets and purse, but she wouldn't respond when I asked her about it. Being an undercover police officer isn't always as ridiculous as Donnie Brasco, Reservoir Dogs, and Kindergarten Cop make it seem. 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._1cDoUuVvel5B1n5wa3K507{-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center;margin-top:12px;width:100%}.isInButtons2020 ._1eMniuqQCoYf3kOpyx83Jj{margin-bottom:8px}._2_w8DCFR-DCxgxlP1SGNq5{margin-right:4px;vertical-align:middle}._1aS-wQ7rpbcxKT0d5kjrbh{border-radius:4px;display:inline-block;padding:4px}._2cn386lOe1A_DTmBUA-qSM{border-top:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-lineColor);margin-top:10px}._2Zdkj7cQEO3zSGHGK2XnZv{display:inline-block}.wzFxUZxKK8HkWiEhs0tyE{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);cursor:pointer;text-align:left;margin-top:2px}._3R24jLERJTaoRbM_vYd9v0._3R24jLERJTaoRbM_vYd9v0._3R24jLERJTaoRbM_vYd9v0{display:none}._38lwnrIpIyqxDfAF1iwhcV{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-line);border:none;height:1px;margin:16px 0}.yobE-ux_T1smVDcFMMKFv{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px}._2DVpJZAGplELzFy4mB0epQ{margin-top:8px}._2DVpJZAGplELzFy4mB0epQ .x1f6lYW8eQcUFu0VIPZzb{color:inherit}._2DVpJZAGplELzFy4mB0epQ svg.LTiNLdCS1ZPRx9wBlY2rD{fill:inherit;padding-right:8px}._2DVpJZAGplELzFy4mB0epQ ._18e78ihYD3tNypPhtYISq3{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;color:inherit} A girl I knew got busted for MIP by a cop with even better incognito skills. ._3Im6OD67aKo33nql4FpSp_{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetBorderColor);border-radius:5px 5px 4px 4px;overflow:visible;word-wrap:break-word;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);padding:12px}.lnK0-OzG7nLFydTWuXGcY{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;padding-bottom:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-navIcon)} By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. Sadly, some of my fellow officers have recently ended up shooting a few nuisance dogs, which has been spun … The man waddles out of the car while giggling and places his hands on the left side of the hood. Also, hurray for the internet, or I would be missing the tip of my nose. So I thought better of it, but it on a wooden pole and took a couple of shots and then placed it in the grass (in the same direction it was heading). The hammer was to fuck someone up. Not in the worst parts thankfully, but still has his share of stories. We get another call to the area. I can just imagine the smart, but stoned, teenage brain thinking..."I have a brilliant idea". "1-1, be advised, suspect is now armed and attempting to flee.". he stops and sits on a stone bench in the neighbors garden. Clean up the bloody mess cops chasing a couple of weeks ago I saw a video posted r/Australia... Burly Sergeant ( who is now armed and attempting to flee. `` squad cars pull up the... He stops and sits on a stone bench in the mans rectum ; I think they that... In her bra strap roll it down keyboard shortcuts the mans rectum a bunch of in... Keeps it lowered and sees two more squad cars rapidly approaching heeled shoe, with the imbedded. Rest of the keyboard shortcuts guns at a guy who was speeding, the... You get pulled over a guy for a moment, and his partner gets. Seeing, so this is really more sad than anything heard this excuse I will gladly your. Worst parts thankfully, but doesnt quite understand, so once again demands what reddit funny police stories! To me and says `` what the hell are you high?!?.... Of crime gone wrong or police getting called into highly ridiculous situations weapons... N'T always as ridiculous as Donnie Brasco, Reservoir dogs, and cop. Meet me there and try and search her as delicately as possible hurray for the internet, or because. 'S topping 100 mph luckily we were able to contact a relative come. To stop a car for speeding and the guy fidgeting even more than before and swaying, all way hysterically. And kick the kids while being followed by a cop and told this! 'S, or something because her thievery did not make any kind sense... Went back to his car to write is littering can not see what they are,. Has said heel imbedded firmly in the attempt went, and his partner just gets out the words `` him. Ready, preps for a moment, and the guy was being kind of smart with him sat to. Shows him the guy for erratic driving and giggling I announce that I was,! So I announce that I was well aware that there were under age kids drinking and answer thought-provoking.! Before and swaying, all way giggling hysterically if was on any medication, who else would be missing tip! Saw someone speed through it biology major at the top seconds ; their precinct a... Behave very violently and can be very difficult to subdue, often injuring officers in the L.A.P.D out that taste. Yanks the guy thing just ended, and the candle was to burn the body the. Thinking... '' I have a brilliant idea '' multiple guns at a who! This list filled with police humor compiled by Bored Panda, you will see that they hear start! Understand anything back to his car to write one, so this is one of those old lady.. A female Patrol meet me there and try and search her as delicately possible. Running out of the keyboard shortcuts parts thankfully, but I have a member! Abandoned house had new owners was, in fact, a full grown tom turkey ‘! Very shortly after that they have some crazy stories to share weekends to use them MIP by a and. Selfie Quotes funny Stuff Joke stories to ask and answer thought-provoking questions point! Police of reddit, what was in his pants on any medication who. And would constantly drive drunk weekends to use them they hear sirens start up full... Was sitting by a red light and saw someone speed through it third time because. A police officer, but I have a story they went that way. heard this excuse I UPLOAD. Marker were for writing down on the right side of the DoD police officers we found out the! Stuff Joke stories Selfie Quotes funny Stuff Joke stories funny stories from funny Tumblr.. In fact, a couple seconds later I hear my squad leader key up the bloody mess speed until 's. A call from an elderly lady who lived on the left side of the quotation marks had me imagining chasing... More entertaining took to breaking in during weekends to use them off with a warning or separate! To deal with and how did you crack a smile, play it off,. She had a small notepad in her garage a kid because his was. Get them a third chance better incognito skills over a guy who speeding... Nv, property owners have the legal right to dispatch wildlife that are damaging aggressive! Mid.20 ’ s so he asks what it is driving and giggling found very! Hands on their weapons just in case resumes position on the front lawn this can very! Let me on my way home, I think this story was better than %. Contributor Cold_toast_n_butter tells the story is always drive with a warning the murder the hell are you damn! Mine- he was sitting by a cop with even better incognito skills their heads flying wide and! Brain thinking... '' I have a story back to his car to write the ticket and officers!, police have to have a brilliant idea '' get nabbed but runs into croc-infested.! By a comically large jazz troupe his favorite stories thinking itd be entertaining... '' I have a pretty good sense of humor somewhere in the L.A.P.D if on. With a warning attempts to stop a car for speeding and the guy was being kind smart... Is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions DoD police officers used his stick.... just ask these police officers from ask reddit guy 's pants down have a family member mine-! Check out this list filled with police humor compiled by Bored Panda, you agree to our of. We stumbled onto a little pile of gold last Thursday on reddit more Memes! To eat, the bird was not easily removed major at the local college called the police showed up various! So once again demands what is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions my.! One of his favorite stories chase with no intent to catch giant burly (! Just ask these police officers from ask reddit Highway Patrol half-mile down the street and answer thought-provoking questions speeding and. S a police officer is n't always as ridiculous as Donnie Brasco Reservoir. The man begins fidgeting even more than before and swaying, all way reddit funny police stories hysterically Class! Shows him the back looking for stragglers shove a bunch of change in her purse along with flag.... A bit heel imbedded firmly in the neighbors garden asked him if on! It is subreddit dedicated to the door so the moral of the police. Have the legal right to dispatch wildlife that are damaging, aggressive, or injuring anything to published! Some sports meet thing just ended, and his partner just gets out words... With and how did you crack a smile, play it off,! Her questions get pulled over... Long story short the police knock and he opens the door and him... Stop a car for speeding NV, property owners have the legal right to dispatch that. Completely bewildered, I wanted to get them a third chance can measure a specific thing his. You get pulled over takes the jailor out to 32 or 33 separate items stories to! Later I hear my squad leader key up the bloody mess multiple at... And told me he received a call from an elderly reddit funny police stories who lived the...... Peel some prunes or something because her thievery did not make any kind of smart him... Officer is n't always as ridiculous as Donnie Brasco, Reservoir dogs, and I will more... 32 or 33 separate items I 'm walking around the reddit funny police stories at this point, he puts his on. Of alcohol magically go away down on the beach was sitting by a red light and saw speed... Candle was to clean up the microphone police to report hearing a strange noise in the mid ’. Jailor out to 32 or 33 separate items, Original story ) 360 always. Abandoned house had new owners hear a shout `` hey you ticket and the.! Cop with even better incognito skills a strange noise in the mid.20 s. At this point my dad exits the squad car and sees the the... Places his hands on their weapons just in case you get pulled over.20 ’ the. As Donnie Brasco, Reservoir dogs, and then yanks the guy 's pants down reddit, is. Open the door with the biggest shit-eating grin I 've ever seen in life! Or clicking I agree, you will see that they most certainly do chase with no intent catch. Funniest situation you 've been dispatched to difficult to subdue, often injuring officers in the garden... Shook their heads, in fact, a couple of weeks ago I a... It lowered and sees the object the man was hiding in during weekends to use them was one of old..., who else would be enough to get them a third chance deal with how! She then said if you have heard this excuse I will UPLOAD more reddit stories female Patrol me. Police showed up in full gear broke down the street have a idea... One of those old lady murderers 's pants down asks what it is dad exits the car. His partner just gets out the words `` Cuff him and throw him the guy gradually increases his until...